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Friday, September 14, 2001

Don't really know why

I went to work yesterday. I don't really know why. Saw a caravan of army trucks trundle across 12th Street just as the bells at Grace Church began to chime 10am. Chainsmoked the entire walk, tried to ignore the weird smell. I lasted about 3 hours in my office, the bookkeeping staff counting money, putting it in little bundles, working up columns of figures, while all I could do was check my voicemail (too many messages to even think about) and watch CNN.

On the walk home, I made the mistake of cutting through Union Square... the people standing around, crying, reading newspapers, collecting socks and blankets in big cardboard boxes, drawing on butcher paper on the ground, passing flowers around. Too, too much.

I've offered my parents' house to my friends for the weekend, but I don't think I can go out there now, as uncomfortable as I am this close to the city, I don't think it's right to leave.

I have been carrying my camera with me at all times, but I haven't taken a single picture. Matty did, I think they are from Wednesday but I forget now. The first one was taken from the steps of our last apartment, last year.

Posted at 03:27 PM

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