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Wednesday, April 21, 2004

People I will not miss when we move to New Hampshire:

1. Anyone who, on the SECOND NICE DAY OF THE YEAR, is already tanner and thinner than Mischa Barfin'. Especially boys.
2. Ugly teenage mom in Jersey City supermarket wearing "If your dick was as big as your mouth, maybe I'd be interested" t-shirt and complaining about peanut butter.
3. Wallace Shawn, who was blocking the aisle in Citarella for what seemed like hours when all I needed was a fucking head of lettuce.*
4. Guy who tried to rob a girl and steal her bike outside my apartment at midnight last night, only to be soundly beaten by the entire population of the block who came streaming out of their apartments to kick his ass.**
5. My next door neighbor who ran out of his apartment to kick the robber's ass. Because he was wearing tiny black panties when he did it. Consider me scarred for life.

* This actually happened weeks ago, but I am still stewing over it. Where's the iocaine powder when you really need it?
** This was actually totally awesome. JC vigilante justice!

Posted at 04:56 PM

Comments

001. BF Big Brother

Wow! You saw Wallace Shawn!?

Posted at 10:24PM on Wednesday, April 21, 2004

002. me

Actually, I see him a lot. Mandy Patinkin, too. Maybe I should make it a goal to meet everyone who was in The Princess Bride. Except Andre the Giant is dead, I think.

Posted at 10:19AM on Thursday, April 22, 2004

003. BF Big Brother

I think I like him best as the Grand Nagus of the Ferengi on Star Trek Something or Other.

Yes, my pop culture memory tells me that old Andre is, in fact, deceased.

That would be a good goal. Who was the girl in it?

You can keep Mandy. He always looks too earnest for my taste. I prefer 'em squinty and snide.

Is this all in JC or the Big Apple?

Posted at 11:33AM on Thursday, April 22, 2004

004. me

Oh, the Big Apple. The only celebrities we have in JC are... PM Dawn. And Ween. The girl was Robin Wright Penn, by the way. She is extraordinarily petite and extraordinarily bitchy.

Posted at 11:45AM on Thursday, April 22, 2004

005. willpie

Oh man, I miss JC. Sigh.

Posted at 02:43PM on Thursday, April 22, 2004

006. z

Was the supermarket Shop Rite or C-Town?

The Shop Rites are so much better here.

Posted at 11:05PM on Thursday, April 22, 2004

007. Amanda

Wow, I had no idea what I was missing by shopping at the comparatively classy A&P!

Posted at 11:00AM on Friday, April 23, 2004

008. Caitlin

Peter Cook is dead, too.

(he played the priest at the wedding)

Posted at 05:42AM on Sunday, April 25, 2004

009. megan

mischa barfin'? ah ha ha hahhahahahaha! that brightened up an otherwise awful morning....

and go vigilante justice.

Posted at 09:59AM on Thursday, April 29, 2004

010. zoe

update: Hudson Valley Shop Rites pharmacies have pregnancy tests and condoms out on display and not begind the counter a la JC.