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Sunday, November 17, 2002
We started a Bingo club called O 69 last week.
Heidi thought it should be called "B4 What?" but we disagreed.
Then Zoe won 141 bucks.
At least she bought us crepes afterwards.
We'll be back next Wednesday.
And every Wednesday after that until we're 87.
Posted at 09:31 PM | Comments (10)
Friday, November 15, 2002
Oh Keith. Keith Keith Keith. Thank you for the Jakeage! I'm going to go die now.
Posted at 12:56 AM | Comments (2)
Tuesday, November 12, 2002
Faith, Hope & Trick.
[spoilers for tonight's episode of Buffy ahoy]
I always *knew* Scott Hope was gay! Continuity rules.
Posted at 08:30 PM | Comments (1)
Friday, November 08, 2002
Oh yeah, links.
Guess I'm a bit rusty. The promised mp3s:
- Helium - What Institution Are You From?
- Marti Noxious - The Parking Ticket (from "Once More, With Feeling")
- Silly and funny electromix of Skater Boi; indulge me, please.
- And as a bonus bonus bonus, a warm and sunny Yoko Ono tune from the Gilmore Girls soundtrack in honor of Indian Summer.
Oh, and I forgot that I took this snapshot of a snapshot from the cokehead party. Whooooooores!
Posted at 10:10 AM | Comments (4)
Thursday, November 07, 2002
WHAT INSTITUTION ARE YOU FROM?
or, 100 things to do when you're not blogging:
1-5. Play Bingo with dozens of fat polish women in their 70s. Count your teeth with your tongue and praise the Lord for modern dental care. Really, really, really jones for a cigarette. Giggle at the woman playing like 74 boards at once who has a portable fan in front of her. Snort everytime the bingo-caller lady says "O 69!"
6-8. Make Nigella L*wson's Norwegian Pumpkin Soup, only use fontina because they didn't have any jarlsberg at the market. Rename it Danish Pumpkin Soup. Serve with Manischewitz mandelen even though the soup has chicken stock *and* cheese in it.
9-13. Get annoyed by the CMJ Music Marathon; stay home all four nights and play Animal Crossing. Mail a peach to Mitzi the cat; receive a giant chess piece in return. Win the fishing competition on Sunday with a 25-inch bass.
14-16. Be baffled by logic problems in your boyfriend's LSAT book. Think about the natty suits and large paychecks that are the accoutrements of those in the legal profession. Wonder if boyfriend would have to wear a large powdered wig if American foreign policy forces emigration to the UK.
17-18. Immediately after #4, look up information on reclaiming Irish citizenship on web. Get distracted by reading other people's weblogs instead. Par for the course.
19-22. Read boyfriend's Christmas list (conveniently posted on the fridge). Consult bank account. Look at list again, notice caveat from Santa Claus that says "Brian gets no Tivo unless he enrolls at NYU to complete his degree." Sigh.
23-27. Buy replacement power supply for PowerBook. Buy replacement keyboard for PowerBook. Try to wipe tiny scratches off screen of PowerBook. Fiddle with busted left speaker on PowerBook. Think about ways to raise three grand for purchase of absolutely amazing new 1ghz PowerBook.
28-30. Watch G*lden Girls. A lot. Start speaking in affected southern drawl to the cats. Shake fist at Lifetime Television in vain.
31-33. Pornsit for creepy upstairs neighbor whose parents are visiting. Remind self not to become bitter burnt-out queen. More short term, remind self not to touch neighbor's two gigantic boxes of porn as contents are inexplicably greasy. Or even worse, explicably greasy.
34-47. Rig up stereo to digitize vinyl. Look for pile of vinyl put together last time this task was attempted. Fail to find pile. Start new pile. Make mp3s of one GoGo's album. Feel proud of results. Start to make mp3s of one Blueboy 12". Notice 60hz ground loop hum on quieter tracks. Ask the modern interweb for help. Modern interweb refuses. Rearrange some plugs and cables. Get excited when hum goes away; disappointed when hum returns two and a half minutes later. Give up on project for 13th time in as many months.
48. Look at those PowerBooks again.
49. Watch G*lden Girls again.
50-53. Watch boyfriend beat Pikmin in record time. Watch boyfriend get two-thirds of the way through Super Mario Sunshine while self languishes on second board of Minna Harbor (goddamn boats! goddamn you to hell!). Secretly gloat when boyfriend is unable to wash Gracie's car fast enough to win a prize in Animal Crossing. Feel like a huge nerd.
54-55. Download ChimeraKnight. Kiss its feet.
56-61. Try to sneak around a taping of Law and Order in one's neighborhood. See Ice-T with skanky blond stripper-like "girlfriend" heading for an SUV after the taping. Fail to see Chris Noth. Remember that Chris Noth isn't on that show, and also that he isn't as cute as he was 8 or 9 years ago. Get absolutely blitzed on one and a half alarmingly strong drinks, stagger home feeling a little worse for wear.
62-69. Have one's place of work taken over by cokeheads who buy drinks for on-duty policemen. Have several of one's shows wrecked by thumpa-thumpa dance music reverberating through performance space from the cokeheads' parties. See waitress uniforms for cokeheads' parties (described by one staffer as "uniforms from the whorehouse in Bedrock). See calming artwork of southwestern desert scenes in one's place of business replaced by close-up black and white photos of nipples with razor blades in them. Cry and bitch on phone with boss while rather drunk. Think about ethics of working for these people. Think about not being able to pay rent. Vacilate.
70-72. Find digital camera left behind by partygoer at the cokeheads' party. Go absolutely insane trying to find the right kind of cable to copy the REALLY CLASSY pictures of girl's butts from the camera. Fail.
73-78. Go to a Halloween party. See somebody dressed up as the Baumer from the Royal Tenenbaums. See someone else dressed up as Avril L*vigne. Giggle. Watch someone do a stupid double-speed dance to some breakbeat kinda record. Leave within five minutes of arriving.
79-81. Get the soundtrack to the Buffy musical on CD for free thanks to connected friend. Skip all the songs involving Dawn. Almost cry during a heartfelt crescendo near the end.
82-84. DO cry during an episode of G*lden Girls where Rose celebrates her birthday and talks to the empty chair of her dead husband. Realize one has cried at least three times since last blog entry; try not to come to any conclusions. (Seriously though, before the Concerned Emails start to arrive, I'm not depressive or anything, and anyway the Buffy-crying was mostly out of joy or something. Yeah!)
85-86. Have large truck drive by apartment warning all residents to boil water for three minutes before drinking due to water main break and ensuing contamination. Put down glass of lemonade.
87-88. Watch G*lden Girls again, and laugh at that bit where Dorothy and Sophia dress up as S*nny and Ch*r and sing "I Got You Babe" while Rose accompanies on the upright.
89-94. Install Photoshop 7 and immediately begin to pine for version 3. Continue to pine during the 70 seconds it takes to start up on your 400mhz G4 PowerBook. While waiting, launch Classic and then launch Photoshop 3. Open two files in Photoshop 3. Notice that Photoshop 7 has finally finished starting up. Realize when switching back and forth between the two that the color picker in OS X is really and trully fubar'd.
95-97. Receive phone call from friend at a CMJ showcase who notices that GYLLENHAAL, J and DUNST, K are on the guest list together. Receive second phone call from friend saying they never showed, but news of their couplehood has now been leaked to Us Weekly. Think about how GYLLENHAAL, J gets his hair to stick up like that all the time.
98. Install some icons for my instant messenger program that make a tiny domo-kun jump up and down in the dock when people message me. Hint hint.
99a-c. Upload some mp3s to kiss people's asses: a. an old Helium tune that for some reason really pushes my buttons; i think it's because of a tiny swishy drum moment, or maybe that part where Mary mutters "hunnnnh." b. A stoopid electro remix of Avril L*vigne's Skater Boy that totally made my day. c. The Parking Ticket song from the Buffy musical; the last line was kind of eaten by dialog during the broadcast but it's a nice suckerpunch on the soundtrack.
100. Write a long and complicated list of shit that you should have been blogging about for the last month anyways.