the weather outside is gorgeous, it was in the mid seventies today... and that's part of the reason why things are going so poorly right now. not only do i have to contend with my shitty job stuff, but the weather is destroying the retail business so my boyfriend is depressed, and when he wasn't depressed he was sick. so i'm barely working though trying to. i've called all the places i have applications at, but nothing retail related is hiring right now. at the TV station i'm trying to get a writing position by using my time to go in for free and write pieces, but the new producer is completely contradicting everything i was told to do the other day. i wrote my stories in the active voice and then she rewrote them in the passive voice, which is just something you don't do.
so i'm really frustrated. most of my friends are working and therefore busy, and even if i found someone to go out i'm making ridiculously little money. the last six weeks i've worked about 8 hours a week. which isn't working out.
they're putting in a new borders and that won't help things. and i'm tired of being stressed about things i can't change. you can only do your fucking best and i can barely afford to pay my bills so why do i worry about how his store's doing? it doesn't help anyone. but he's being so distant lately. so i'm alone without him and even when he's there it's like i'm the only one in the room. i know it's not about me but i'm just really lonely.