So I am watching a History Channel Halloween documentary, and there is some sort of Hollywood 50s party with little Liza! and little Candy Bergen!

I got the novel of Halloween and I read some of it the other night and I had bad dreams. Ack.

I hope the Lutherans have some new stock this weekend. Maybe they have some sweaters to use for yarn. HA, I have reached that level. Or t shirts, cause I have iron on letters and ribbon now. And I got a marking pencil! This is exciting news. One day the T Shirt quilt will be made!!! Maybe I can find flannel sheets and dye them, or something.

1) Ann-Margret on Third Watch? Make her a judge on L&O and hello! Best Episode Ever.
2) Tunes had the Pet Shop Boys produced Liza album for a dollar! And in excellent condition! I love looking in 'rock' stores, they put really good stuff in the $1 bin. Or when you're looking at the same time as some straggly haired guy. Woo hoo, he passed up the Claudine!!
3) Tuna potato cakes!

Lucie Arnaz and Robert Klein in "They're Playing Our Sentence Hearing"

Also, add Melissa Errico to the list.

Okay, I think my new project must be making parody Broadway tunes for L&O. C'mon, what an awesome idea! It'll be like that Schlock Rock showtunes album, but, you know, good (Dear Lenny Solomon, you are no Larry Kert!!!! Or Jerry Orbach for that matter! love, rosemary)

I've just met a girl named Serena....

OH MY GOD WHAT WAS I THINKING HOW COULD FORGET ELAINE STRITCH?????

(with Barbara Barrie in a "Company" medley)

Since there's no Law and Order blog (HINT, HINT) I might as well discuss my brilliant idea here: The Law and Order Cast Album! Starring all the Musical Stars who have appeared!

A Jerry Orbach and John Doe duet
Dean Wareham and Jesse L. Martin singing about the Lower East Side (and the corpses we've discovered there)
Ice-T and Shirley Jones in "People Will Say We're in Love"
Faith Prince!
Sandy Duncan and Bebe Neuwirth in a showstoppin' dance number!
Peter Frechette!
Mandy Patinkin singing "Send in the Clowns New ADAs"
Paul Sorvino and Patti Lupone singing songs from "The Baker's Wife"! (hang on, I have that record!)
Chip Zien and Stephen Bogardus reviving excerpts from "March of the Falsettos"! (er, ditto)
Jerry Orbach and Paul Dooley reviving Three Penny Opera songs.... and then arresting Macheath on suspicion of the death of Suki Tawdry!
and with jazz piano by special returning guest Michael "What the Fuck Do You Know?" Moriarty

with your hosts Tovuh Feldshuh and Rob Leibman

I found some BSC books at a thrift store. But the republished versions! For readers at home to fill in! Which I shall for your enjoyment.

"Mary Anne has a crush on Logan. I now have a crush on someone named Person X. This person is 30+ years old and has brown (or maybe blue, depends on the crushee) eyes and brown hair. I like this person a lot because a)oh my god, he is so fucking hot or b) he is nice to me. If I was going to spend an afternoon with this person, I'd like to shag the bejesus out of him walk around the park. One thing I would not want to do is discuss music criticism. Some things we could talk about are records, cooking, thrifting, travelling The biggest crush I've ever had was on the Indie Fuckwit (haha original recipe and son of, ugg). I had a crush on this person because I was really fucking stupid and I drank a lot then What happened was this: he turned out to be a total dick and got married. The biggest crush anyone ever had on me was when I'm not really sure, but interweb mentalists like me. When I found out this person had a crush on me, I was flattered, yet wasn't interested

I had no idea I'd turn out like this when I was reading these books in middle school. Or that I'd want to sleep with old30something year old men.

So I went out last night and boy, was I lookin' good. But now I feel gross, thanks a bunch Container Store. Christ almighty.

I bought a Good Housekeeping Guide to Homemaking for 50 cents today, ooooh, I'm depressed enough to clean the bathroom.

So yeah last night's decision making was "local drinking, support friend's band" vs "hang out with people who think I'm hot". Is it wrong to be disappointed when coworkers do not notice that a foot of hair is missing from your head?

I finished the Kitty Hat from Stich N Bitch and it's cute! I think some of the stiching is a bit messed up... seed stich with decreases is weird. Also pulling through is difficult, especially with not exactly clear instructions. I didn't do double ears, too hard! Pompoms totally rule though

I really think I am going to tell fortunes at the record fair. (tell fortunes = play MASH) (Why does no one seem to know MASH?)

Thanks to stalking abilities a well known search engine, I have discovered that the boy who told me "If you take off your dress, I'll turn the [Francoise Hardy] record over" is a psychiatrist! Gah. And he has a column in a national newspaper, which I knew, though I have to laugh when he mentions "don't drink, don't smoke, eat well, exercise" in some how to stay healthy context since I met him when we were inebriated (yeah yeah, aren't they always), but more memorable was when he accidentally ashed on my face later that evening. Or morning. That is not a euphemism or anything. He was on top of me and smoking, and the cigarette ash fell onto my face. He was apologetic, and I laughed it off because the whole evening was utterly absurd.

(Then there was the "don't worry I won't interfere with your viriginity" comment that came later on, and boy was that crushing. He was a doctor! How could he think I was a virgin?)

(I wish I could still fit in that dress. I best stop eating cookies and Halloween candy and start planning out meals and measuring food.)

(Oh, summer 2001. What good times. It's really been downhill since, hasn't it?)

tokyo rosemary:1 rodent:0

I was chatting online with C and F about the mouse issue, and they suggested cheese and chocolate. I put out the last of the spring traps with a cheese and peanut butter combo, and was discussing picking up some candy bars at the Rag Shop tomorrow when I hear THWACK from the other room. Holy cow, that's loud. The one trap in the heater closet had gone off. That place is just full of holes, so it's no freaking wonder. (I will go lay lots and lots of traps there, after another Shop Rite run) Only the head got caught, and its tail got stuck in the glue trap. I donned some rubber gloves and got some snadwich baggies. I feel like a Law and Order bit player. The mouse was bleeding out of its ears and nose, ewwwww. I was determined not to touch the mouse. The glue trap just kept getting stuck everywhere, and I had to use three plastic bags. Then I, uh, went to put it outside. Hey since I get all of JC's garbage in MY yard, the empty lot next can get my mice corpses.

Okay there's a Peter Allen bio on Trio! Have you read Lorna Luft's biography of her family? "The only gay person in our family was Peter Allen! And we had no idea at the time! And neither did he!" Okay, you keep on thinking that! Ha, this documentary says Judy fixed up Liza with Peter. Goodness. Should I start buiying the Peter Allen albums I find in thrifts/yard sales?

I got some weird stuff today. A big bag of art markers for $1 and LOTS and LOTS of sequins also for $1. What can you do with all those sequins? I think I'm gonna sit around and sniff the markers, wheee. It's all pinks and blues and greens and oh "pale flesh" and not ahem, "peach" And I found a book on NYC thrift stores (by the author who brought you the book of toilets in Manhattan). It's ten years old, but a good starting point, I think. I had never thought of Staten Island as a thrifting destination (but who knows how long it will be until I get there). I must say though, what's with the NYC Salvation Armies charging $2 for records? Not good, espeially with the state they are in. Angel Thrift has gone up to $2, but there's a slightly better quality (in both the genres and styles of records stocked and the shape the records and sleeves are in.)

I also saw some yarn, but the whole box was $10! And it was very unexciting yarn. I could get a whole projects worth of yarn for that (or less) at Pearl, and with fun colors and textures.

I think I am going on my third day in a row with out a proper lunch.

Hi, I'm 15! Why? Because I have spotted former Sassy staffers in my friendster network and I'm totally thrilled. This is way better than Gerard Cosley !!!

And I now have instructions on how to knit a fun fur jacket and YOU KNOW I'M GONNA DO IT.

I made red velvet cookies. Since the funfetti cake mix cookie batch worked a treat, I decided to experiment with other 99 cent cake mixes. (Cheaper than premade, but more than strictly homemade? Well, the butter can sometimes cost nearly a dollar for a full batch of cookies anyway, plus mixing cups of sugar and sticks of butter is more work than premix + oil +eggs) They taste a bit... funny. And when the cake mix started to go menstrual clot red when mixing, that was slightly disconcerting. Not that either stops me from eating, like, ten cookies.

And I made cheese sauce from SCRATCH. I do not come from a From Scratch Household (it wasn't complete processed food central, but my mom gave her aunt the frozen leftover turkey carcass rather than make stock herself) It was a nice treat to have a non tomato sauce on my ravioli. I'm still not sure I've got the hang of the oil and garlic, it just seems like it's not right.

But this is really just to say that the last rant got me in such a mood that I rilly rilly want a cigarette, but since that's out of the picture, I am reminded that I bought limes! And little individual pineapple juice bottles for Pterodactyl FUN. I think I will save up on the supplies for next weekend if I go to a Local Show to save on the money (bonus: alchohol effects won't wear off in the five minutes it takes to get to the bar rather than the hour it would take to get to Manhattan. Other bonus: getting back home less of an ordeal, especially when drunk)(Note to self: maybe let's not chug large amounts in front of aquaintances this time)(Oh gosh, July WAS the last time I got drunk, this is going to do nothing for my reputation, scratch that, DO drink lots.)

Oh god, another night of insomnia, I can feel it. Maybe what gets chugged tonight is Nyquil. Mmm, red flavor!

This week I found two records I didn't know existed (and therefore needed) : Albert Finney's Album (On Motown!! This is like Lena Zavaroni being on Stax, file in the "no way!" department) and "Cabaret" in Yiddish!

The thought of the upcoming record fair is sort of giving me the creeps. I managed to stay in the Metropolitan Pavillion for about five (??) hours the last time, but I think I may revert to my usual freaking out after an hour. (Even though I'll have to be there for three! Well staying in one place for most of the time does cut the edge) I hope I can get a volunteer posting in the AV room. Whee! Sitting in the dark! Maybe I'll bring my knitting! I think I am just slightly annoyed by recent examples of women not getting named on air when their male counterparts did, and this and other ongoing examples of No Girlz Allowed clubhouse mentality (both subtle and blatant) is just really really starting to push me over the edge (to what, I don't know). Or maybe hearing kneejerk anti "Britney Aguilera"' (sic) music comments in 2003 (and I don't even know if I like current pop music either) and reading the nasty bile against Olivia Records and NOW in an old Rock and Roll Confidential Report with it's fucking creepy comparison of Cris Williamson to Pol Pot is not making music culture anymore endearing.

And I finally finished a project! (besides a scarf)(and I finished knitting two others, but they need sewing together and I have no idea how to do it neatly) My cute little toque is finished. The new Stiitch and Bitch book has fun designs. I am always looking for patterns for fun accessories instead of ugly ass sweaters. Well not ugly as much as horribly tasteful and dull colors. Beige? Pea green? Burgandy? Goldenrod? Or way too busy. Who wants flowers or argyle when you can have SKULLS!! (Punk Rawk affinities die harrrrd, my friends) (Or crap, I forgot I was going to try to plan and knit Westwoody/Sex Pistolly sweater that I saw discussed on a craft bulletin board. Tell me how to knit THAT, Rowan!)

I saw some large yet super simple knit scarfs in Urban Outfitters. I am so glad I have a keychain that has a measuring tape, 'cause I just whipped it out (oh shush, you in the peanut gallery) and started measuring guage. I have got to find some cheap acrylic in lysergic colors. The bulky Lamb's Pride has some nice crayola colors, but... can someone drive me to the Rag Shop, please?

And I STILL have that FUCKING MOUSE in my apartment. Yeah, my sloppiness doesn't help but neither DO THE FUCKING HOLES in the walls and the horror that is the closet with the heater. I mean, yikes. (Maybe I should go to the L*ck* S*v*n and complain, as I hear the owner was the guy who did the half assed job fixing up this building) The glue traps do diddly squat, maybe I should get some old skool spring traps... does cheese work? Or is it Peanut Butter that's the thing. Maybe I'll get that and the mouse poison, too. NO COMPASSION FOR YOU, RODENT! I'll shell out a whole five bucks! I am just paranoid that it's gonna start eating my clothes, and the mattress in the sofa bed, and wires which will cause fires. Blarg.

Free food I have had this week:

* half a butter bagel
* two snapples (iced tea and lemonade)
* spicy tuna and cheese wrap
* roast potatoes
* skewer of meat
* cookie
* risotto
* farfalle with chicken in a creamy sundried tomato sauce
* turkey, ham and roast beef sandwiches
* bite size pieces of cake

Thanks, hair salon and street fair!

I hate everyone ever. I am off to join a separatist commune in Wyoming, see ya'!

So last week on Law and Order they said "shit," and SVU has been using "prick" for ages, but my sources say they think they heard "fuckwad" this week. Well! Can anyone confirm???